Does self-help become
shelf-help for you?

Here’s a trick to better use what you read:

1. As you read, have a notebook & pen beside you.
2. When you find something to do or remember, make a note.
3. Transfer actions to your schedule with a due date.
4. Share ideas to remember – email or call a friend, write a summary for clients, blog it, tweet it or present it.
5. Donate the book to a friend or library.

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Recently I received a question about the current series Make a Fresh Start: 12 Days of New Beginnings.

The reader raised the issue of our tendency to backslide when we try to make a fresh start, and wondered what we could do about it.

Here are some brief thoughts.

Why Self-Improvement is Like Slaying Vampires

1. Whenever we try to change or improve, we come up against pressure to regress to old, comfortable ways.

This is to be expected. Entropy rules in human nature, just as it does in the rest of the universe. New habits take work, as new pathways need to be forged in the brain.

2. Because of this, we have to be kind to ourselves when we backslide – we’re only human after all.

Pretending the resistance isn’t there, or beating ourselves up for our lack of willpower is simply denying reality.

3. But – and this is important – we also have to recognize that to be happy, and to enjoy a sense of progress and achievement in life, we have to keep working to maintain our gains, and to fight off the urge to regress.

Change is not a set-and-forget switch, it’s an ongoing process. We’re never done!

If you’ve ever watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer, this analogy might help:
To fulfill your destiny, you have to keep killing the vampires. They never stop, so neither can you.

Image: http://www.flickr.com/photos/fluffgar/ / CC BY-SA 2.0

Today’s the first day of Spring in Australia, where I live. You can already smell jasmine in the air!

In the US September is the start of the academic year – for students, a new chance at good grades; for parents, an opportunity to get re-organized at home.

Wherever you live, why not make the start of September your time to make a fresh start at something you’d like to change?

I’m going to make a fresh start at something in my own life – in fact, I’m going to make 12 fresh starts in 12 life areas over the next 12 days. I don’t expect to succeed at everything, but I want to give a bunch of things a try.

I’ll share my journey with you in the hope you’ll be tempted to join me in at least one life area.

What is a ‘Fresh Start’?

I’m defining a fresh start as a change that fits one of these categories:

• Start something new – or try something you haven’t done, eaten, read, or experienced before
• Give up something – maybe a habit that undermines you or an obligation that weighs you down
• Do more of something – be specific about ‘more’, but don’t be overly-ambitious
• Do less of something – be specific about ‘less’, but don’t be overly-ambitious

12 Days of New Beginnings

Here are the life areas I’ll focus on over the next 12 days:

• Day 1: Personal Development
• Day 2: Health & Fitness
• Day 3: Career & Business
• Day 4: Fun & Recreation
• Day 5: Technology & Social Media
• Day 6: Home
• Day 7: Personal Presentation
• Day 8: Happiness
• Day 9: Money & Finance
• Day 10: Relationships
• Day 11: Time Management
• Day 12: Family

Want Some Ideas?

If you want ideas for places to make a fresh start in each of these life areas, check out my (currently free) Organize Your Life & Goals Workbook Planner. It has more than 120 suggestions.

Day 1: Personal Development

Today my fresh start is to do more of something. I’m increasing my weights* in Body Pump class for biceps and shoulders (I currently use teeny-weeny-where-is that-ant-taking-my-weight weights). I’ll let you know how I go tomorrow – when I’ll make my second fresh start.

I hope you’ll pick a life area and join me!

To leave a comment: Scroll to the bottom of this post – a comment box is waiting for you.

*This could fall under Health and Fitness, but I have another, uber-challenging fresh start planned for that life area tomorrow.

Image: http://www.flickr.com/photos/tacitrequiem/ / CC BY 2.0

The 12 Days of New Year’s Resolutions

This is Day 1 of The 12 Days of New Year’s Resolutions for Better Personal Organization

I’m spending 12 days posting ideas for new year’s resolutions you might like to choose for yourself. Each day focuses on a different life area.

Remember: go for progress, not perfection.

Following is an edited extract from the introduction to Module 1: Personal Development in Get Organized Wizard for Smart Women. 

Day 1: Organize your Personal Development

Is this an area of your life that gets neglected? In the face of daily pressures, family challenges and the holy grail of life-work balance, many people never stop and think about their personal development.

Yet it’s personal growth that keeps us fresh and alive. Without nurturing our own development we can run out of fuel and start to feel like we’re running on empty in our commitments to others.

Without stopping to foster our own growth we become stagnant. We get fed up with ourselves and maybe even resentful toward the people we see as standing in the way of the things we ‘always wanted’ to do.

This is the time to stop all that unhealthy stuff, to recover the childlike part of you that wants to explore, to re-kindle the fire in your belly.

Ideas for Personal Development New Year’s Resolutions

• Books
  One of the easiest ways to freshen up your thinking is to read. Why not start compiling your list of stimulating books – fiction and non-fiction – to read. It’ll feel wonderful to tick off those titles!
• Comfort zone
  Expanding your comfort zone is one of those things you can’t help doing once you make the decision. Choose a growth area and you’ll start to notice opportunities. But be gentle with yourself!
• Trying new things
  Don’t be someone who harbors regrets about the things you ‘always wanted to try’. Start getting those desires out of your head and into your life. You’ll find a new you.
• Overcoming fears
  If a fear doesn’t interfere with your life then it may not be a concern for you. But if you feel a fear is holding you back, think about how you might start to tackle it.
• Training
  Is the lack of a particular skill holding you back in your job or career? Plan your sales, speaking, management, media or other training so you have the edge you need to move to the next level.
• Bad habits
  Vague plans to give up habits that hurt you ‘one day’ usually aren’t effective. Start identifying the habits you want to change and planning how you’ll make these changes.
• Good habits
  If you envy others for their punctuality, optimism, assertiveness or exercise habits why not set yourself up to develop these habits yourself? Or choose and work on your own good habits.
• Spirituality & mindfulness
  Consider whether you want to make room in your life for regular spiritual practice, meditation, religion, prayer, reflection, spiritual reading, or mindfulness.
• Uplifting work
  Does your office or desk evoke a sense of disorder? Or downright chaos? Work toward a more inspiring, less distracting environment so you can enjoy producing good work.

Question: What area of personal development will you work on in 2009?

Note for users of Personal Development Wizard and Get Organized Wizard for Smart Women

Your Wizard contains guided worksheets for each one of these items, plus others, as well as additional prompts, ideas and suggestions to help you organize each one.

Tomorrow – Day 2: Health & Fitness

Picture adapted from image by Aldon.

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Expanding your comfort zone is one of those things you can’t help doing once you make the decision.

The trick is to think ahead about the areas where you want to grow.

Choose a growth area and you’ll start to notice opportunities – then you just need to give yourself a little encouragement to take one small step at a time.

Ideas for expanding your comfort zone

• Speaking up in meetings
• Wearing more interesting clothes
• Going somewhere new
• Starting a conversation with someone
• Seeing a different kind of movie
• Reading a book from an unfamiliar genre
• Going to a restaurant with cuisine you’ve never tried
• Traveling to a new holiday destination
• Shopping somewhere different
• Changing the order in which you do things
• Trying a new brand of something – anything!
• Doing something different at the gym
• Switching radio stations
• Buying music from a new artist or genre

Open yourself up to new things and you’ll find that as your comfort zone expands, so too does your confidence. Just be gentle with yourself!

In what areas would you like to expand your comfort zone?

Image by Yemisi Blake